


Rocks Squared

by CheshireAsh



Category: Black Panther (2018), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: A certain lack of explosives sadly, BUT ONLY TEMPORARILY, Ceiling Vent Clint Barton, City of gold: Not found, Crack Treated Seriously, Defacing a national monument, Gen, Genius Peter Parker, Genius Tony Stark, Harley Keener & Peter Parker Friendship, Harley Keener is a Good Bro, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Hurt Peter Parker, I literally just take the characters, Irondad, Irondad & Spiderson, Meme Lord Peter Parker, Meme Lord Shuri (Marvel), More rocks, Mount Rushmore, Movie plots do not matter, National Treasure is mentioned, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Peter Parker & Shuri Friendship, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Protective Harley Keener, Protective Tony Stark, Rock rocks, Sensory Overload, Spider Powers act up, Steve Rogers is done, The Author Regrets Nothing, The Grinch - Freeform, Thor is a swear, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Is Done, YODELING, because you gotta pay tribute to Jack Payne, he's learning, lots of them - Freeform, rocks, spiderson, the smolder, well maybe a few things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:54:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26517790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheshireAsh/pseuds/CheshireAsh
Summary: Then he got an idea. An awful idea. Peter got a wonderful, awful idea. What if I got a bunch of rocks together? And some modge podge and some pictures of a certain celebrity. What if I put Dwayne Johnson’s face on some rocks? Oh the puns! The memes!aka Peter and Friends™ Go Through a Day of Creative Liberties and Shenanigans and End Up Defacing a National Monument
Relationships: Harley Keener & Peter Parker & Shuri, Harley Keener & Tony Stark, Michelle Jones & Peter Parker, Michelle Jones & Shuri, Peter Parker & Harley Keener, Peter Parker & Shuri, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 15
Kudos: 95





	Rocks Squared

**Author's Note:**

> For the first time literally ever, I planned out this oneshot before I started writing it. 
> 
> And it's beta read!  
> I got my bestest friend to read through it for me and she managed to fix a ton of grammar errors for me and just generally made the story better.  
> She's also a fantastic writer, so go feel free to check out [Tigerlily26](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigerlily26/works)because she's awesome.

It was just an ordinary Thursday for Peter Parker. He woke up at 6:30 in his room at Stark Tower, where he spent his weekdays, before trying to go back to sleep because 6:30 is far too early to be awake. Well, that was how he felt until he who will not be named, also known as Clint Barton, came into his room with a bucket full of freezing cold water. Then his thoughts on the matter changed very quickly. Bolting up, Peter got ready in record time, all while avoiding the bucket of pain and the hysterical laughter of Hawkeye. He managed to make it out of the building without any further mishaps, which he was quite pleased with himself for. Peter strolled down the street, casually waving to people he knew and whistling a tune that he couldn’t exactly remember the name of.

This was when Peter’s day took a turn for the worse. While his spider powers did come in handy for superhero activities, the senses that were constantly with him did not especially help him in his ordinary life. Occasionally these supposedly amazing senses would turn on him. They could become his greatest enemy. This was exactly what happened to poor Peter on that fateful morning. 

It started with his taste. Peter had grabbed a granola bar on his way out that morning, in order to at least try and avoid any problems from a certain superhero with a bird name. He shall remain unnamed. The problem with the granola bar was that he found that he could taste every single separate part of the heterogeneous mixture. Oats, honey, chocolate chips, they all jumped out at him. Directly after that came touch. His taste buds felt inflamed. His clothes grated on his skin. Anything brushing even the slightest amount against his skin felt like burning. As he continued to stumble down the street, his bouncy jaunt becoming increasingly irritating and painful, smell kicked in in full force. Apparently someone up in an apartment above him was having bacon for breakfast. Normally, Peter would love the enhanced smell of bacon filling his nostrils. Unfortunately for him, this bacon was burning. Peter gagged but continued on, his loose clothes rubbing uncomfortably against his arms and legs. 

The smells of the city only got stronger as he entered the subway station. People were disgusting and that smell was permeating Peter’s nose. He found that he could smell that that old bald man sitting across from him hadn’t showered in a week, which could have been pretty interesting if he was looking at it from a purely scientific point of view. Unfortunately for him, he was unable to look at it like that, instead becoming consumed by the pounding headache that was developing. He covered his nose with his arm, which thankfully helped somewhat. Now however, he could only focus on the smell of the laundry detergent on his sleeve. Apparently May had bought a new brand. It was much more citrusy than the last one. 

That was when his ears absolutely exploded with noise. Whoop-de-doo. Being in constant misery is Peter’s favorite pastime. Did you know that ant’s footsteps actually make noise? That sound was so similar to normal human footsteps that Peter almost wished that he lived in a world where literally everyone was an ant. Much less pain and suffering would occur if that was true. Or maybe he could work with Mr. Stark to create a shrinking ray. He put in some ear plugs that temporarily helped, but all of his senses were steadily getting stronger and stronger. He knew that sight would be the worst though.

Thankfully for him, his sight didn’t spike for a good long while. He managed to get to class without very much trouble. He sat down and slammed his head against the table. The pain did distract him very temporarily from everything else but when he lifted his head blearily up, he was blinded by the lights above him. Those cheap tube lights aren’t even very bright! He groaned in pain and a few of his fellow students that happened to be lurking nearby looked over in slight concern before turning back to their pointlessly loud conversations. 

The day did not get any better. Ned didn’t show up. He had texted Peter about his status of sick, but Peter couldn’t look at his phone without an excruciating headache pulsing through his skull. All of this compiled together and led to Peter feeling like Ned had abandoned him. MJ instead sat down next to him and poked him in the arm in an attempt to make him pay attention to whatever nonsense the teacher was currently spewing. It honestly felt like she was stabbing him.

“Yo loser,” she whispered. Peter winced. Even whispering was too loud in his sensitive state. “What’s up with you?”

Peter just groaned again. “It honestly feels like there’s snakes inside of my spine. I just want to rip it out.”

MJ seemed unsurprised by the statement. “Just do it you coward.”

Peter managed a weak grin. “Only if you replace my bone marrow with glow stick fluid and crack it once I’m gone.”

“Deal.” They shook on it.

Then Peter flung his head back into the table. It was becoming far too difficult for him to deal with his enhanced senses in school. Literally everything was just piling up on itself and it was just becoming worse and worse. He weakly raised his hand. “Can I please go to the bathroom?” 

His teacher looked surprised, which probably had something to do with the fact that Peter rarely missed out on an opportunity to learn, but she gave him permission and a pass. He half bolted, half stumbled out of the classroom. He headed into the bathroom without much incident and locked himself into a stall. With only pain on his mind, Peter could only think of one thing he could do. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Tony Stark.

After only two rings, the multi-billionaire picked up. “Hey Underoos, what’s up? Shouldn’t you be in school right about now?”

Peter nodded before remembering that, despite all his brilliance, Mr. Stark was not able to see him through a phone call. “Sorry Mr. Stark,” he gasped. “You were just the only person I could think of.”

Tony was instantly more alert at the sound of pain in Peter’s voice. “You good Underoos? Because I can send Happy straight over to your school to pick you up.”

Peter made a noise of affirmation. “That might be best.” Just then someone else stomped into the bathroom, slamming open the door and turning the fluorescent lights on with it. It was simply too much for the overwhelmed Peter. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed on the ground. 

He woke up in his room at Stark Tower. Very high tech noise cancelling headphones were wrapped over his head and he found that silence comforting. As he slowly peeled open his eyes, he was granted the sweet release of a dark room. Light blocking curtains covered the windows and all the lights were off, even the Iron Man night light he keeps in the corner of the room. Peter was so incredibly thankful for this act of kindness that he immediately snuggled into the silky sheets that did not irritate his skin and fell into a peaceful sleep.

Meanwhile, Tony Stark was pacing the floor in his workshop. His mentee (He definitely did not consider Peter his kid, nope not at all) was in pain and there wasn’t much that Tony could do to help him. Yes, he was able to provide some tech that could provide some comfort and he was able to give him a safe space to recuperate, but Tony wasn’t sure how to help on the mental side of Peter’s problems. He was certain that the effects of this morning would have put a strain on Peter’s emotional well-being, but Tony was at a complete loss as to how to relate to his kid when it came to anything outside of the lab. 

Suddenly, the great and powerful Tony Stark had a thought. It was really more of an epiphany; it was that brilliant. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and quickly dialed the number of the one person who he knew could help his boy. Harley Keener. 

Thankfully Harley immediately picked up when his phone started to ring. “What?” he asked groggily. “I literally just woke up.”

Tony had to fight the urge to laugh. He had forgotten all about time differences. But he managed to stifle his chuckles in the face of something far more important. Peter’s well-being. “Peter’s been having a rough day with his…” Here he paused, looking for a different way to say Spider-man thing. Just because Harley was privy to that particular information didn’t mean that it should always be said out loud for all the world to hear. “His pet spider died?” Tony tried. His attempt to be subtle was very poor, but at least Harley got the point. 

Over in Tennessee, Harley sat up straighter in his bed, blearily rubbing his eyes. “Alright old man, I’m up. What can I do to help?”

Tony smirked. “I’ve already sent my fastest jet to the closest airport. Be there or be square.”

Harley groaned. “One, stop trying to fit in with the cool kids. Just because we’re connected doesn’t mean that you aren’t old. Two, does that mean you’re sending the NWOOM jet?” Harley was not ashamed to admit that he screamed the word nwoom at the top of his lungs. True, this led to him getting yelled at by his mother and sister, but it was all worth it.

Tony said nothing, instead hanging up and covering his poor ears in pain. “All I’m hoping for is that they don’t cause chaos. Please no chaos today.” Chaos occurred that day.

Meanwhile, Harley was smirking and rubbing his hands together in what he hoped was an evil manner. “He’ll be hoping that I won’t cause chaos. Well unfortunately for him, I’m bringing in backup.” His smirk only grew as he pulled out his phone to call another friend who would aid him in his quest to cause Tony as many problems as physically possible.

Peter woke up in a cloud of what felt like nothingness. It was absolutely amazing. The headphones were beginning to become a tad uncomfortable so he took them off. He was incredibly grateful to find that his senses had died down for the most part. He was able to lay there in complete bliss compared to earlier. 

Suddenly a voice came from the ceiling. “Sir?” 

Peter cringed, the noise still a touch too loud for his sensitive ears. “Quiet down Chad.”

“But Sir, I require-” 

“I’ll listen to you if you lower your volume!” Peter had been working on an AI of his own. Sure he loved Friday and Karen, but they weren’t his children. He wanted a personal robot child of his own. And so Chad was born. He was a little bit clunky still, but he was learning new things everyday.

“Oh sorry,” Chad said, his volume lowered significantly. “I need your help with something Sir.”

Peter pulled himself up and grabbed his phone. “What is it?” He had made it so that he could access every part of Chad from that device. 

“Um,” Chad paused. It seemed to Peter that he was slightly embarrassed to ask. “I need help getting into a website.”

Peter looked up at the camera in his ceiling in confusion. “What?”  
“There’s this thing called a Captcha? And I can’t get in.”

Peter stifled his laughter, pulling up the website that Chad had been attempting to enter. “This the one?” Chad made an affirmative noise. After proving that he wasn’t a robot and allowing Chad access, Peter sunk back into his bed with a huge smile on his face. He was back to sleep in minutes.

The next time he awoke, it was due to the door creeping open. Now to a normal person, this wouldn’t have been audible in the slightest, but Peter’s enhanced sense of hearing made it incredibly easy to hear. He sat up quickly, ignoring the headrush that filled his vision with black. To his astonishment, Harley and Shuri were standing in the doorway, looking very awkward. 

“Peter!” Shuri yelled as she ran into the room. Peter’s senses may have been less intrusive than they were that morning, but they still were not at a level that appreciated someone yelling in the same room as him. Because of this, he flinched at the sound. Seeing this, Shuri immediately stopped and started apologizing. Thankfully she was apologizing in a whisper, so Peter felt comfortable getting out of bed. He was fairly certain that they wouldn’t yell again anytime soon. 

“Hey guys,” he said in a soft voice. “What are you doing here?”

Harley stepped forward into the room. “The old geezer called me to ask me to come. He sent the-” It was very difficult for Harley to restrain himself from yelling nwoom again, but he cared about his friend enough that he managed to do it. “He sent the nwoom jet to come get me.” He then elbowed Shuri. “I know just how much Tony loves the chaos we cause so I decided that, for the greater good, I should call Shuri to come join us. Then-”

Shuri butted in at that moment. “Then I jumped in my own nwoom jet and got here pretty quickly if I do say so myself.” She looked incredibly proud of herself. “How about we do something fun! We could blow something up or-”

This time it was Harley’s turn to elbow Shuri. “Or we could turn on a Disney movie and watch that together in a heap on Peter’s bed.”

Ten minutes later found Peter, Shuri, and Harley doing exactly that with Cinderella playing in front of them. It was playing at the lowest possible volume for Peter’s comfort. 

Peter grew more and more comfortable as the movie continued. They even were able to turn up the volume about a quarter of the way through! It was this point halfway though the movie, that Peter began to spiral into his thoughts. Harley and Shuri came all this way for me, he realized. They barely ever get to visit, and I’m so lame that all we can do is sit in front of the TV and watch a kids movie. Granted, it’s a very good kids movie, but that’s besides the point. What does the sun taste like? Wait no, that’s off track. What could we possibly do? We do sciency stuff all the time, so maybe that? No that’s too predictable. Oh. OH. 

Then he got an idea. An awful idea. Peter got a wonderful, awful idea. What if I got a bunch of rocks together? And some modge podge and some pictures of a certain celebrity. What if I put Dwayne Johnson’s face on some rocks? Oh the puns! The memes!

Peter sat straight up, untangling himself from the pile of friendly limbs. Both Shuri and Harley looked over at him in confusion, both having been previously engrossed with the movie. He ignored their worried looks and instead stared straight into Harley’s soul. He forced his face to be completely blank. “We must create the rock rocks,” he drones in a monotone voice designed specifically to freak out the duo.

It worked, especially on poor Harley. He looked panicked and froze up, side eyeing Shuri to see if she had any idea what’s going on.

She obviously had no idea but instead of joining him in his panic, she was just incredibly amused by Harley’s fear.

“Would you mind explaining what that means?” she asked, trying not to laugh at the face of fear that Harley was making.

How long can I confuse them? Peter wondered. With this goal in mind, he told them that “We will be upgrading many rocks.”

Because his sensory overload was basically over at this point, Peter grabbed both of their hands and dragged them out of his room and into the elevator. As they stood in the elevator, Peter’s two friends seemed minorly put off by his behavior while Peter was just grinning like a mad man. They eventually ended up in the common room and they met exactly who Peter was hoping to see. Tony was sitting on a couch with Steve and Clint. 

“We need rocks,” Peter intoned, making his gaze blank again and tilting his head slightly. 

Both Steve and Clint join Harley and Shuri in looking concerned, but Mr. Stark just looked done. “Talk to Friday about it. Just don’t bother me again.” 

“Plot twist,” Peter whispered to Harley. “We’re probably gonna bother him again.” Harley laughed, nodding in agreement. The three of them turned in unison and headed back upstairs. 

In the elevator, Peter looks up toward the camera. “Hey Friday,” he asked her, an excited gleam in his eyes. “You wouldn’t mind procuring a few items for me?”

Friday laughed, an artificial sound that you could almost pretend was real. “Of course Peter. What do you need?”

Peter grinned a large, cheshire grin. “Oh just a few things.” He paused, composing his thoughts. “I’m gonna need lots of rocks. And modge podge.” 

Both Harley and Shuri were still confused. “What do we need those for?” Shuri asked, a gleam in her eye that could only be described as conspiring. 

In lieu of answering, Peter just shot her a grin before sending one last request at Friday. “I’m also going to need as many pictures of Dwayne Johnson as there are rocks being gotten.”

With that, Shuri and Harley immediately realized that their best friend was putting them together. Peter let out a cackle, throwing his arms into the air. “You finally recognize the absolute genius that is Peter Benjamin Parker! MWAHAHAHA!”

“YEEEEEEEAH!” Harley and Shuri yelled together, each throwing an arm into the air in an imitation of a superhero pose. 

56 minutes later, they had claimed the dining room table. All of their supplies had been spread out in an array in front of them, and the three friends had stepped back to consider the mess. Hundreds of small, smooth rocks were on the table and somehow a large container of mod podge had already spilled all over a portion of the large table. But it’s fine. Everything is perfectly fine. 

Once everything was set up, Peter assigned jobs. He decided that he would have the very important job of carefully cutting out the faces. Harley would apply a layer of mod podge and lay the cut out face on it. Shuri would apply the final layer and smooth out any wrinkles or white spots left over. 

It’s a pretty good assembly line, if Peter does say so himself. It’s effective too. The work is incredibly mind numbing, but the group managed to get by. They collected multiple movies that the legendary Rock himself had acted in and they planned to watch every single one of them. They started with Jumanji, laughing and just generally enjoying the movie. 

Once the credits started rolling, Tony walked by. The poor man had been trying to go through the room and into the kitchen, but he happened to glance over at the large scale operation. He kept walking toward the kitchen door, but then he did a double take.

“What in Thor’s name are you doing?” 

At that moment, Thor strode into the room, which surprised all of its occupants as he had not previously even been on that planet. “You called?” 

Tony spluttered and just held his head like he was in actual physical pain. “What the actual hell Thor? It’s just an expression.” The god nodded and swiftly left. 

Slightly in shock still, Peter explained what he and his friends were doing. By the end of the explanation, it had dawned on Tony just how absolutely brilliant his protégé is. To come up with such a plan and execute it successfully… Tony was just so proud of his son. 

With this in mind, he joined in. Asking Friday to start Moana, he began helping Shuri with her task. Soon, they had a system where Shuri would apply the final layer of mod podge and he would put the final touches on it, making it look as good as it possibly could. Unlike how it would be with most parental figures, it wasn’t awkward in the slightest having Mr. Stark join them. It was instead fun and he was able to join in on the joking, and he took many blows to his self esteem when the kids poked fun at how old he was. 

At one point, Clint Barton dropped out of the sky. Or it might have been the vents that he dropped out of, but that doesn’t really matter. As soon as he dropped and noticed what was happening before his very eyes, he froze before slowly returning to the vents. The quartet burst into laughter as Hawkeye’s feet disappeared into the vents yet again. 

“Did you see his face?” Tony managed to get out in between bursts of laughter. Then he quit laughing. He had an idea that was practically on the same level as Peter’s genius plan. “What if…” he paused for dramatic effect. “We managed to get Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson’s face on a very large rock.” Peter and friends did not seem to see the genius of this suggestion, but then Mr. Stark explained further. “Think about it. What’s a rock that is known for having faces on it?” 

Unsurprisingly, Peter was not the one who figured it out. Instead, it was Harley who had a smirk that suddenly appeared on his face. “Oh I see,” he said slowly and appreciatively. “I see and I completely agree.” He let out an evil sounding cackle with Tony joining in after a couple seconds.

The other children were still confused, and Shuri was the one to voice this confusion. “I still have no idea what you are talking about you stupid white boys.”

“Yeah,” Peter added, trying to put in his two cents. “Stupid white boys.” Quite obviously, neither of these insults was meant maliciously as they both burst into laughter soon after talking. 

“So,” Harley started. “Mount Rushmore.” That was all it took. All skepticism was gone and every single one of the group was on board with the plan to carve Dwayne Johnson’s face into Mount Rushmore. 

With the group’s support, Tony went off to start making calls to make this plan a reality while Peter, Harley, and Shuri finished up the rest of the rock rocks. 

“Now guys,” Peter said with a grin sliding over his face. “I may be stupid but I’m not dumb.”

Shuro snorted. “Debatable,” she muttered. This comment earned her a smack on the head from Peter. 

“Shut up,” he muttered, his face bright red. “Now as I was saying,” he said pointedly staring at Shuri. “I am low intelligence but high wisdom. I may not know who is on Mount Rushmore, but I do have a fun fact about it!” He paused for dramatic effect, obviously learning some new habits from Mr. Stark. “There’s a guy who got fired from the carving of Mount Rushmore for yodeling! His name was Jack Payne and there isn’t much to learn about him but I think that it’s pretty funny that he managed to get fired for yodeling of all things. Now how about we pay tribute to Jack Payne and yodel while we finish!” He ended his fun fact with a whoop and a fist thrust into the air. 

The other two joined him and they immediately started yodeling at the top of their lungs. Unfortunately, all three of them were a little bit rusty when it came to yodeling so it didn’t sound fantastic. Every Avenger that was in the tower at that point in time panicked and rushed out, trying to avoid that terrible noise. The remaining rocks did not take long to finish and very soon, the rock rocks were completed.

“Time to distribute!” Peter yelled, his sensory overload now completely over. Since Tony was still working out some details, they set out into the city on their own. Each of them carried a large bucket full of rocks with the Rock’s face on them. The buckets were incredibly heavy, being filled with straight up rocks, but they got by, leaving many back at the tower and forcing Peter to carry most of the rocks. This role was given to Peter because of his super strength, but just because it was easy for Peter to carry all the rocks didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to complain the entire time. 

The team leaves the rock rocks everywhere. Some are left in fairly normal places, like on benches while others are left in fairly… odd places such as webbed halfway up a building. Peter was obviously sent to leave those rocks. After about half an hour of wandering the city, leaving rock rocks all around, they realized that they needed help. And so back up was called in.

Peter texted Ned to see if he was too sick to join them, and quickly learned that he was faking being sick. Why? He had a chemistry test that he hadn’t studied for and had thought he would fail. As his parents weren’t home, Ned was able to join them in their quest.

He was given a bucket of rock rocks and sent on his way, spreading joy as he went. The original trio were about to split up when they encountered MJ. Unfortunately for her, she did not see them. In short, the three grabbed MJ and dragged her into a nearby alley. Surprisingly, no innocent passerby sounded an alarm at the sight of a teenage girl being dragged off, but hey! It’s New York. 

“MJ,” Shuri said seriously, staring her straight in the eyes. “Join us.” MJ looked incredibly nonplussed at the fact that she practically just got kidnapped. Instead, she agreed to join them. 

“It’s only because she-,” MJ pointed at Shuri, “Is a total feminist icon and I want to spend time with her. I wouldn’t voluntarily spend time with you losers.” She shot Peter a small smile to let him know that she was joking. 

“Alright!” Shuri squealed. “Female bonding time!” She grabbed a bucket of rock rocks and MJ’s arm, dragging both of them off into the city. 

Peter and Harley looked at each other and shrugged, grabbing the remaining rock rocks and wandering off together. “What if the word female was said the same way tamale is?” Peter asked, simply to start up a conversation. 

It sure started a conversation alright. Well, it was more of an argument. But anyway, it continued as they left rock rocks everywhere. 

Unbeknownst to the culprits, #rockrocks had been trending on multiple different forms of social media. Pictures of them were popping up literally everywhere on the internet and everyone was collectively asking one question. “Who was leaving these brilliant items around New York?

Nowhere was safe from the five children. Children's parks were covered in rock rocks. Random apartment balconies? The owners came outdoors to find a rock rock sitting there staring at them. Large business buildings? Dwayne Johnson was seen smoldering at the office workers from tables and inside of the pots of the fake plants scattered throughout the building.

Soon enough, every single rock rock had been distributed. Having left them all over the city, the five conspirators reconvened in Stark Tower. When they arrived they got some very exciting news. Tony Stark had received permission to put the Rock’s face on Mount Rushmore. It was decided that a celebration was in order! After a quick party involving soda and pop tarts, they all put their heads together and started planning out the miraculous fifth face of Mount Rushmore.

A year later, as well as massive amounts of bribery and funding from one Tony Stark, the face of Dwayne Johnson was carved next to the important persons of Mount Rushmore. The biggest party of the year was held at the base of Mount Rushmore, and Peter and his friends spent much of the time searching for a hidden city of gold, like in National Treasure. Unfortunately for them, nothing was found, but a great victory was won that day regardless. 

The largest rock rock the world had ever seen was now permanently carved into a mountain and would not be touched for thousands of years. Aliens who came to reinhabit Earth after humanity died out would look at the sculpture and assume that Dwayne Johnson was some sort of prehistoric god for the race that had previously lived on the planet that they now called home, and they worshiped him as such.

**Author's Note:**

> This work is almost based on a true story. Obviously some parts are embellished, but me and my friend (The beta reader) did in fact create rock rocks and distribute them at school.
> 
> Thank you for reading! I am a lonely soul and require constant validation, so any comments will be read will enormous amounts of glee. Thanks!


End file.
